Veröffentlicht am 2018-03-13 15:00:00 in /int/

/int/ 44267692: Help Bernd pick method of suicide

aluisio_azevedo Avatar

After my first thread a few days ago, I think I have narrowed down suicide methods to the following three. Each has pros and cons. Help me decide on which is best.

I value:

No Pain
No danger to other people
Nothing gory.

1) Low-drop hanging
>Pro: Easy to get materials and most simple
>Pro: Death should come quicker than other methods
>Con: Might be very painful for 5-10 minutes

2) Lit charcoal grill inside
>Pro: Should be completely painless
>Con: Will have to get a charcoal grill
>Con: Will be dangerous to other people
>Con: Chance of discovery while unconcious since it will take a while to die after passing out.

3) Helium mask
>Pro: Should be completely painless
>Pro: Most peaceful method
>Con: Have to order things from the internet without being found out, which will be difficult because I moved home to my parents
>Con: Pure Helium is hard to get apparantly
>Con: Have read multiple accounts of failure
>Con: Chance of discovery while unconcious since it will take a while to die after passing out

What would you choose Bernd? Any alternative methods? No access to guns sadly.

thomweerd Avatar

don't do it

marciotoledo Avatar

Why kill yourself?

Bernd Avatar

>No danger to other people

You're thinking of literally killing yourself, what would you care?

degandhi024 Avatar

You have access to tablets/darknet?

atariboy Avatar

fucked to death by horse

wahidanggara Avatar

i'm pretty sure i'll bu jumping off of a bridge into a river
at least 15m high
you basically have no chances of survival, even if you survive the impact you'll drown in water
cons: will be hard as fuck to get you out

mbilalsiddique1 Avatar

Hypothermia while drunk.
Jumping off a high place.
Shotgun to the heda.

Don't forget to send a plushie!

vladarbatov Avatar

>suffering on Denmark

amboy00 Avatar

just cut your wrists and wait to bleed out

zacsnider Avatar


>you basically have no chances of survival, even if you survive the impact you'll drown in water

Yeah, there are no bridges nearby to jump from. I'd need to travel 400km's for a suitable one. I also have great fear of heights, so probably couldnt do it anyway.


I actually considered hypothermia while drunk, since some Baltic poster suggested that in the other thread.

I see two problems:
1) I am a lightweight drinker and get nausea and throw up really easily.
2) High chance of discovery in shitty Denmark with no nature left.

michigangraham Avatar

Well it has to be done quick so that you dont have a chance to change your mind
So pills, grill and helium mask are out of question

Honestly i would recommend shotgun to the head or taking cyanide

joeymurdah Avatar

Helium mask being completely painless is controversial, some believe it freezes your lungs

krdesigndotit Avatar

luckily there are at least 3 suitable bridges in kyiv so im fine
still really afraid to do it but in 2018 i'll most likely kill myself

kuldarkalvik Avatar

>Yeah, there are no bridges nearby to jump from
>No bridges
Are you le rarded?

aadesh Avatar

>I suffer on the Dennmark
what did he mean by this?

craighenneberry Avatar

why u kill self?

mr_arcadio Avatar


IQ89-tier method. Has super low success ratio.


No access to shotgun or cyanide pills.


Did you not read? I said the nearest is 400km away. I'm not an island nigger. Besides, there is no way you can walk out on Great Belt or Øresund Bridge, even if I was close.

gmourier Avatar

My method:

Chill out and just drink alcohol in the evening, sometimes binge for days, sometimes sober up, and just live without worries untill I die.

aadesh Avatar

I think I found the broblem of danebro:

>because I moved home to my parents

n_tassone Avatar

failure in life

p_kosov Avatar

don't do it

hota_v Avatar

I am going to kill myself because I never had a gf. This will be the one and only reason for my death.

buleswapnil Avatar

You can use any substance that knocks you out or renders you immobile.
So, about that plushe. Are you interested?

VinThomas Avatar

You seem to have decided already that you don't actually want to kill yourself from all the disadvantages of suicide methods, some nonsensical, really, that you are so desperately trying to bring up when considering all the suicide methods.
And that's kind of fine, actually.

andrewofficer Avatar


>because I moved home to my parents

Thats certainly part of the reason. I dont want to reveal anymore because there are only a few Danish posters and I dont want to risk my anonymity.

Lets just say that the fundamental reason for not wanting to live anymore is the same as this: >>44267913

sava2500 Avatar

>le dannish tranny posting

joeymurdah Avatar

Op,just come to Brazil. You be killed as soon you leave the airport if you go to Rio de Janeiro.

tmstrada Avatar



I'm a dude 100%. A failure of a man, but still a man. I don't think there are any Danish trannies.

xravil Avatar

You could acquire cyanide from gold mine sludge ponds.

iamglimy Avatar

Even when you kys you are a sissy, OP.

wtrsld Avatar

Another quick method is suicide by train. But that just messes with people, especially train drivers.

xarax Avatar


Honestly, I'm just scared of failure. I think its normal.

mj_berthelsen Avatar

But I wanted to be your gf

jajodia_saket Avatar

Pain free except maybe nausea(medicine for that antiemetics)
Toxic salts like cyanide, azide, nitrite.
Inert gas asphyxiation, carbon monoxide(grill or generator in a small space, even a waterproof tent), helium, argon, nitrogen.

There's also Hydrogen Sulfide(works the same as monoxide(painfree, you just fall asleep)) but this is incredibly toxic and if you don't leave warnings to anyone who might find you it's very possible that they will die.

Personally I'll go with carbon monoxide or hydrogen sulfide or hanging(unconscious in 15-20 seconds) and dead in a few minutes.

tereshenkov Avatar

heroin overdose. when you fall asleep your body forgets to breath

souperphly Avatar

Been thinking about doing this too. Let me know if you are successful OP

thehacker Avatar

It's allways a matter of volume/time ratio.
Mice are also killed painless just with CO2. If the vent has the proper settings it's no problem. Doesn't matter what gas it is as long as it doesn't contain O2.

craigelimeliah Avatar

CO2 will cause you to panic because how breathing works. Your body don't even notice CO poisoning, you peacefully fall asleep.

mbilderbach Avatar

Don't do it.

dwardt Avatar


I have no access to toxic salts, guns or any of that advanced stuff. I'm just a failed Bernd in a shit city who had to move back with his parents after failing at life for the second time.

You mention hanging is 15-20 seconds to die, but thats only if you manage to achieve compression of the arteries (carotid and vertebral) and veins (jugular) in the neck, otherwise you will die from suffocation, which could take 5-10 minutes even.

However, I am also leaning towards hanging right now. Its the most simple of them all. Maybe from some position where I can keep my feet on the ground and reposition myself if I dont manage to compress arteries/veins

artheft_ua Avatar

Why would they cause different symptoms when the cause is the same?

okcoker Avatar

I remember helping an amerifat calculating the ratio of some household chemicals to make some really potent nerve toxin. You could look into it.

commoncentssss Avatar

It's don't if you know the approx. volume of your room and approx. aperture of your valve.
With a ratio small enough you won't notice a thing.

t. animal kill help helper

kuldarkalvik Avatar

But burning stuff in an airtight sealed room werks too. You could even stream it.

greenbes Avatar

Why is it always such a meme gas to kys?
Use nitrogen!
- painless, since it is the same gas you find in the air and the body doesn't convulse
- you are just getting more tired by the second until you RIP in pieces
- even when you are found, oxygen must be provided immediatly, but normal mouth to mouth doesn't cut it, since you are filled with nitrogen and you are dead before oxygen levels can reach again a safe limit

- you have to get it somewhere (when you don't have money, you can steal it out of a ambulance, look at a workshop for those, when you have chemical company in the near, there have usually nitrogen pipes everywhere with connectors / valves not so far apart (that is btw. the preferred method of how people here in the company kys; after that method they like to jump off higher buildings).

markgamzy Avatar

>I suffer in denmark

Bernd Avatar

The reflex to breathe is caused by CO2 build-up in the blood. If you continue to breathe CO2 the reflex gets stronger and then you start to panic for normal healthy air to breathe, the cause of death is the same (hypoxia) but one method is peaceful and pain free while the other will cause your last moments to be fearful.

rcass Avatar

Anna Karenina climax scene - Lay your neck on the track as the train comes by.

greenbes Avatar

Even small kids manage to hang themselves. Buy a strong rope, find a tree(if you can, you are in denmark after all) or some place at home, make a slip knot and hand yourself. Easy.

hammedk Avatar

Can't you ask a tiny apartment to your government? You pay 50% taxes if you work, this should be provided in bad times. That could really save your life.

jodytaggart Avatar

Anyway, i gtg.
OP feel free to contact me at [email protected]
t. plushie bernd

guischmitt Avatar

>Help Bernd pick method of suicide
Immigration to Russia.

alek_djuric Avatar


I guess you are right. I am probably overthinking it. Just afraid I will fail somehow. I think I will go with hanging. Its simple, not dangerous and little room for error.

fffabs Avatar

Is there anything that would stop you?

wahidanggara Avatar

This will work but will not be painless.

smaczny Avatar

Con: If you fail you don't wake up with a funny voice to lift your mood

oanacr Avatar

order liters of ethanol and drink until alcohol poisoning stops your breathing

syswarren Avatar


My situation is unimprovable. Ill tell you about it, because honestly I dont care anymore if someone dox me.

I'm fucked economically, socially, romantically and academically. I was living in my GFs apartment, studying in a city far from home, trying to complete my masters degree for the second time.

She left me three weeks ago due to my depression and social anxiety. Now I have no money to live on my own, so I had to move back to my parents in a shitty village far from my University, which means I cant complete my degree, which means I will fail my Masters for the second time. Even if I somehow could support myself and live alone, I have no friends so I would be lonely. My parents are poor and cannot support me. Because I have already failed my Masters degree once, I cannot get any social benefits. My depression is stress related, so there is no way I can work and study at the same time. I get anxiety and panic attacks from even checking my emails and opening official letters and I have lost 10kgs in a couple of months because I have no appetite.

So yeah, I see no way out. I've been talking to a psychologist for about a month, but even they seemed to agree that my situation was hopeless.

Im a failure at every single aspect of life and I cannot take it anymore. Im too old, its too late for me to change and fix my life. All my hopes and dreams are crushed.

christauziet Avatar

>I was living in my GFs apartment
Keinbernd Raus

im_jsmith Avatar

>live in 1st world
>decide to kill yourself
wtf is wrong with you faggots

splashing75 Avatar


You care too much about society. Everything you mentioned as unsurmountable problems are man-made constructs and artificial hindrances.

t. knower

joshuapekera Avatar

Why not get a blue collar job at come city, like a barista or smth and rent a flat, while studying/browsing kc at free time?

necodymiconer Avatar

>white collar

kriegs Avatar

Suicide delayed = Suicide cancelled due to "too complicated".

Just get a shit job & know you control your own destiny, since you no longer fear Death.

tweet_john Avatar

Before trying anything -but better don' do it- I would file a living will, specifying to be put to rest in case of coma or any other incapacitating outcome. But again, don't do it.

sementiy Avatar

if he did that at this point, there's a good chance that it could be overruled (from having been done under a suicidal mindset)

illyzoren Avatar

Thiopental natrium.


judzhin_miles Avatar

Lol I was looking into writing a will last year when I was feeling suicidal and found out you need two witnesses to sign some forms in front of a lawyer before submitting it to the Registry of Last Wills. Obvs I don't have any friends so I can't even write a will.

freddetastic Avatar

You don't have notary in your country?

antongenkin Avatar

Didn't ever read

hoangloi Avatar


suprb Avatar

Yes but I still need two witnesses

cyril_gaillard Avatar

Obtain small sample of obscure Soviet-era Nerve Toxin through your MI6 controllers so that Russia gets blamed.

Make sure to take enough & don't share with relatives.

alek_djuric Avatar

>suffering in Lithiania
Oh, wait...

saarabpreet Avatar

Honestly, you westerners are fucking pussies and you in particular.
But I don't want you to die, Bernd. So who the fug cares? Find a job, stop studying, live with your parents for some years and bring yourself up.
That's what I would do in Slavlands with no welfare.

ninjad3m0 Avatar

>I suffer with neetbux programs

trueblood_33 Avatar

Don't do it Bernd